Real Men Cry
Joseph's tears, public and private
By Shuly R Schwartz; Provided by the Jewish Theological Seminary, a Conservative rabbinical seminary and university of Jewish studies.In the 1970s, football star Roosevelt "Rosey" Grier sang "It's All Right to Cry" on the landmark record album "Free to Be You and Me," produced by Marlo Thomas.
The former New York Giants defensive tackle told us, in the Carol Hall song, that "crying gets the sad out of you. It's all right to cry; it might make you feel better." Feminism had arrived in America, and men--including football stars with feminine nicknames--were permitted, even encouraged, to show their emotions and cry.
The Assassination of JFK
A decade earlier, on the cusp of the feminist era and of an era of turmoil in America, I saw my dad cry for the first time. He stood in front of the TV, tears streaming down his cheeks, as he watched the events of that afternoon in November, 1963, when President John F. Kennedy was assassinated. Stunned by the horrific tragedy, I was also jolted by my father's open display of emotion. My dad was a caring and loving man, but as a child, I suppose I too was influenced by the norms of the day: Grown men didn't cry! It would take the Kennedy assassination, Marlo Thomas's recording and a whole series of events and social changes in American life to make a man's crying, even in the private confines of his home, socially acceptable.
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